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"* The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries.* A man calls 911 and says "I think ...y wife is dead". The operator says, "How do you know?" The man says "The sex is about the same, but the ironing is piling up!"* I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."* My. "Let's wait for him there then, it will save us wandering all over the country, and I don't want to be caught and sent to fight the Romans." You're right let's head back to my camp then."During the four day journey I found out a lot about Mark. He had stumbled into the shimmering on his way to see a woman friend, and from how he described her I have a funny feeling it was Lilia he was on his way to see.We arrived back and the women were nowhere to be seen, but after a short time they emerged. "I know, you told me I chose him over you. I guess I never truly believed you would not be waiting for me when I was done. I just hope we can be friends again." You have always been my friend. I can't imagine you not being my friend for any reason in the future. I just don't necessarily see us as more than that, right now. I hope you understand where I'm coming from," I said."I do understand, but like you said, I don't have to like it. I realize we needed to reset things, or we were doomed to. Perhaps we can work something out at a Holiday Inn to satisfy your retainer." I don't know any Holiday Inn except in the movies." Will martinis at the Palmer House in the loop be okay, say tomorrow at seven thirty?" Sure, but don't expect a suit and tie." Audrey smiled and left his office, leaving the incriminating pictures behind.The retainer went well and worth every dollar of his usual fee. After a couple of martinis, she took him to the penthouse, undressed him, then fucked him like a bitch.
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