I needed to do the yard so began mowing the front then moved onto the back…it was nearly 10 when I finished. I brushed myself and went to the fridge...to see if she had made the pudding and there it was in a large bowl. Her butterscotch was the best I ever tasted…sweet with a little salty trace.I felt really grimy from the yard work and wanted to explore their house but I didn’t want to track yard stuff all over it. I decided that since I brought my trunks I’d grab a shower. I stripped down like. No house, no wife, no kids, no side hustle, no backup plan.I sit up groggily in the shitty cot my step-dad set up for me in the garage, smirking as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, thank god we live in Miami, eh?My few meagre belongings were tucked under a military-esque pop up cot, squared away in my patrol bag, a few more in the trunk of my 1969 Ford Mustang Boss 302. Even in the dim light it’s matte blue paint with white racing stripe finish gleams, spotless. My most prized possession.I. The interviewer speaks occasionally; the nervous interviewee does most of the talking? I'm guessing.Today I feel something different. My normal spot near the front door and by the window is taken. I cannot watch the people entering and leaving. I look around the room and spot her. What the fuck is it about her that is so intriguing?I get my pecan roll, put some fake sugar in my coffee and look for a new spot. There are several groups of old men. There are a number of women chatting; groups of. But that's not what this story is about, I'm just establishing "slut factor". This story is about FARTING. First I want to say the best thing about my wife's flatulence... her big round ass RIPS the biggest, most airy, odorless, nearly odorless, ANAL ACOUSTICS I have ever encountered. And like she often does, she's embarrassed to bring up, or suggest, certain things. So she makes it look like an accident, or like it was my idea. It started when she asked why I like to gape her ass. I said "I.
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